Imperfect Pose, Perfect Reminder!

Hey you 💛

How’s summer treating you so far?

Montreal has been blessing us with such soft, golden days lately, and I’ve been trying to soak them in, one little moment at a time. Last weekend was one of those simple, beautiful days I’ll probably remember for a long time.

I and my friend went for a yoga session at Parc La Fontaine with this amazing Yoga instructor, Paulina. The sun was out, the breeze was  breezin’, and the whole vibe felt light and calm. It brought a quiet sense of joy and happy shifts like when you just know life can actually feel soft... if you let it. It’s just that sometimes, without even realizing it, we get so used to bracing for the opposite.

This? This was unplanned… kinda...

📍Parc La Fontaine

Before we joined the session with the other fellow yogis and rolled out our mats, both of us had a mini photo session (of course!!!😄). My friend is training to be a yoga instructor, so I ended up taking some really graceful pictures of her doing the Tree pose. Just watching her move so freely and joyfully inspired me to try it too.

There I was…laughing, moving, doing my own little version of Tree pose, while she captured a few pictures of me.

Later, when I looked at them in my gallery, one photo in particular made me pause. It was just me smiling. Big. Unfiltered. Happy.

But it was more than just a smile. It was a snapshot of growth, freedom, and unlearning.

And that exact moment inspired this post.

I used to wear the badge of perfectionism like it was an identity.

Ever since I was a kid, I felt this constant urge to do everything perfectly, to get things just right.

I still remember crying rivers over one tiny question I missed in a maths exam and refusing to eat the whole day because I was so mad at myself for not getting full marks.

I remember being so adamant about making things look flawless and effortless. I drove myself crazy in this constant quest to make everything perfect...no flaws, no cracks, no room for error.

Maybe it was because I believed I always had to win, even if it came at the cost of my mental and physical well-being.

I thought the competition was out there, when in reality, it was always within me.

I’d spend so much time stuck on making one part flawless, that I’d miss the bigger picture.

I’d pour my energy into perfection, and leave things unfinished, because I lost interest under the weight of needing them to be perfect. And the worst part was… I wasn’t having fun.

And in that tug of war between perfection and anything that was on the other side....perfection won!

Every. Single. Time.

Sometimes I finished late. Sometimes, I didn’t even finish at all. Sometimes, I did, and it brought me temporary satisfaction. But, I never enjoyed the process.

Sure, I collected some achievements along the way. But when I think about them, they don’t bring me joy the way some of the random, joy-filled moments do. Where I didn’t care how it would turn out. I was just in it.

None of them gave me this smile that comes from doing something just for the joy of it. From being present. From letting go of what it “should” look like, and simply having fun with it.

I carried that perfectionist mindset into adulthood too.

It stopped me from starting so many things I really wanted to pursue.

I’d plan and plan, trying to make every part flawless, and in the end, I’d be left drained, anxious, and stuck.

That version of me missed out on so many things, because I was too busy trying to plan every angle, every outcome, every move.

I let the pressure win.

Eventually, I ran out of that fuel that kept burning me out but never actually led to anything fulfilling.

It didn’t light me up. It drained me.

That fire I kept feeding was supposed to fill me with purpose, to help me create something meaningful... something that felt whole, lived-in...something I could look back on and feel alive every time!

But instead, it left me running on empty, disconnected from the very things that once made me feel alive.

Eventually… I had to school myself, starting with this one word: “Enough.”

What changed is I started doing things I’d usually avoid. I allowed myself to try, to mess up, to enjoy it anyway. I let go of the rules I had written in my head. I started chasing joy instead of perfection. And somewhere in all of that, I found my spark again.

Launching this blog was definitely one of the steps that pushed the shift...right up there with all the other “just do it, even if you cringe later” moments. It taught me to loosen my grip a little, but still hit that publish button.

Still show up in the next blog post.

Still keep things moving, even if half the time I’m figuring it out as I go.

December 20, 2024 💜

I still have my “what-was-I-thinking” moments, more often than I’d like to admit.

I still take wrong turns..emotionally, creatively, and sometimes literally!!!

But now, it’s more of a hands-on approach...I learn through doing, through feeling, through just being raw and authentic in my words on this sacred space I created in just a month.

And somehow, it has become my own inspiration and motivation! It has become my fire!🔥

It reminds me I can learn, wing it, trip over my own ideas......and still show up.

Now, I am an imperfect artist in every sense.

I create. I explore. I laugh. I move. I show up with all the heart I’ve got. I’m as happy as a seagull with a French fry!😜✨

And that’s how I know I’m slowly getting those lost years back… on my own terms.☺️

So....this is your sign…do the thing. Don’t wait for it to be perfect. Do it badly if you have to, without beating yourself up for it. Just let yourself be in it. Do it with heart. 💛

If it’s meant for you, and if it truly lights you up, you’ll learn.

You’ll grow. You’ll get better.

And one day, it will feel flawless… but this time, it’ll be filled with memories, joy, stories you can share with your kids, and all the beautiful mess that made the journey yours.🥹🌸

If you’ve made it this far, thank you for holding this moment with me.

Now I’d love to hear from you...🙌🏻

What’s one small reminder you’ve received lately that made you pause, reflect, or smile?

Share it in the comments below or just say hi...I’d love to know you stopped by.💜